Posted in Depression and Anxiety, napowrimo, Poems

Sadness

It hurts inside, this sadness I feel.
I wish it would stop.
It cannot, not until he returns.
I feel like I can barely breathe or eat or sleep without him.

Is this wrong? Is this right? Is this normal?

I don’t understand. Why?!

I got to a quiet house that I share with our two babies.
As fluffy as they are and sweet as can be.
They only help, perhaps, a little.

I talk with him. I text with him. I send goofy pictures to him because I know he will find it amusing and yet this sadness still lingers.

I wish it would go away.
I’m sure it will once he returns but why did this sadness become so great so easily?

It’s so hard to focus, so hard to concentrate here while I type this away inside my cubicle.

Whenever I hear “When you’re gone” I want to cry but don’t.

I can barely sleep without him there beside me in bed. I wake in the middle of the night crying, because of how much I miss the safety of his arms, the comfort of his words and the emotion in his burning amber eyes.

I wish he didn’t have to go or I could go with him.
I know I’m being selfish. I understand that. I just want the sadness to go away. It hurts to so much. It aches. This grey encircling ball in my chest. It aches. It squeezes. It yearns. It cries when I do not. It screams when I won’t. It yells when I can’t. It fights to be released, to release the emotions that I keep away. I won’t.

I miss you. Come back soon.

Originally written 2008 July 29th.

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Author:

I am a job seeker. I am looking for a position in a fast pace office setting that is seeking a loyal, dedicated, quick learner who wants to help and improve those around them.

2 thoughts on “Sadness

  1. Hola! I’ve been following your weblog for some time now and finally got the courage to go ahead and give you a shout out from Houston Texas! Just wanted to mention keep up the excellent job!

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